SHELLI JOHNSON
Are you afraid of writers?
“A little talent is a good thing to have if you want to be a writer. But the only real requirement is the ability to remember every scar.” ~Stephen King
Most writers have long memories. Some of us may wish we didn’t. But the fact remains that if you cross us, hurt us, humiliate us, or do any multitude of things that make us feel less than, you can pretty much bet that you will, at some undetermined point in the future, show up in a story and not in a pleasant way.
You may not recognize yourself. You may be a character with a penis the size of my pinky finger. You may show up as a character in a mental institution. Or a character with hygiene issues, massive amounts of back hair, no social skills whatsoever. Or my personal favorite, a character who gets killed off in the most gruesome way possible. You get the gist, right?
We don’t need to admit this to you. In fact, in most cases, we probably won’t ever admit it. But we’ll know, and that’s what matters. We’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that we hold the power and that you, the people who shamed or disgraced or angered us, are helpless to do anything but let the scene play out on the page. We’ll also have the pleasure of knowing that our audience may chuckle and point fingers and be glad they aren’t you.
AND MY POINT IS . . .
Here’s a little warning from me to you: You should be careful, you should think twice, before being mean to anyone . . . but especially to a writer.
Are you afraid of writers? Please feel free to share your thoughts & experiences in the comment box below.
Shelli Johnson
Writer
Shelli Johnson is an award-winning author and journalist. Her debut book, Small as a Mustard Seed, has been heralded as “a superbly-crafted and reader-engaging novel” that will “run you through an emotional marathon at a sprinter’s pace.” Learn more about Shelli here. Keep in touch through her newsletter or subscribe to her blog.
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43 Responses to BEWARE ~ Writers Have Long Memories
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The size of your pinkie finger? Remind me not to make you mad Shelli.
Hi Kenny! LOL. That’s only reserved for people who really cross the line.
Oh…that’s your pinky finger? Wow…
On the plus side, what would we do as writers if there were no scars? Some scars are deeper and uglier than others, but if we’re writing about them then at least we have a chance to use them to our advantage. It might not make the hurt go away completely, but you know what? Sometimes it makes it go away enough.
Hi Richard! It’s very true; it’s the scars that make the best writing, IMO. Plus, it’s the scars that people can relate to & that’s what makes a story compelling.
Parents should warn their kids never to join in bullying, because some of the kids they torment will remember that treatment, and they may disguise the guilty parties’ names just enough to cover their own asses.
Hi Alyson! *waves* Yes, hopefully this post will serve as a warning.
Bahahaha! Love it.
I’d give an enemy a penis the size of a pinky finger, too, but only if it was a woman. Sting!
Hi Adriana! Glad you liked it. Sometimes it is nice to exact revenge . . . on the page, of course.
LOL Shelli,
It’s so true! It can be so cathartic, I laughed at your 2nd paragraph, it is exactly what I did in my novel. You have some of the best stuff! xo ?
Hi Sandy! Yes, it is cathartic even if I never publish it; just to write it & get it off my chest is often enough.
Thanks for the compliment. Cheers, darlin.
That is undeniably true. In my novel, Rose’s Will, my entire family felt my wrath!
Hi Denise. It’s my hope that more people will realize, before they act, that some people, especially writers, have long memories. We don’t forget & can reach back through the years and remember things that others may have long forgotten.
I’ll have to remember to stay on your good side. Please remember, I gave you an award before you posted this topic.
LOL.
Richard Alan
Hi Richard! You completely crack me up. Yes, the award puts you in my good graces.
Cheers!
Just for the record… I think Shelli is one of the most beautiful, talented and creative writers you’ll find this side of the 21st century. Okay, I think I’m safe now. Either that or I’ll show up in grisly death scene for showing a bit too much flattery.
Seriously, though. Shelli, you always have such a creative way of getting your point across. I always love reading your posts!
Cheers!
Rob
Hi Rob! Okay, now I’m just LOL! I completely didn’t expect or even think about the lovely consequences (all this flattery!) that this post would have when I was writing it. Thanks for the fabulous compliment; you are safe.
Cheers right back at you!
Phew! I was sweating bullets!
What an awesome Monday giggle you’ve shared here, Shelli. Filled to the brim with truths!
Yep, I’m with the rest of the guys in the comment thread that had to read the “pinky finger” reference twice; followed by my own personal response of, “Oh my!”
I’m also laughing my butt off on what Adriana shared… too funny!
Thanks Shelli, this was awesome!
Hi Deeone! I’m so glad that it gave you a giggle. Makes me smile.
Thanks for the fab compliment.
Haha! I do this all the time. Sometimes I don’t realise until I get partway through a particularly nasty characterisation, that I’m basing it on that person that did that thing to me one time. Then I just cackle and keep going.
Someone else mentioned that we need the scars: absolutely. Sometimes, being a writer, I tell myself in bad/scary situations ‘It’s okay, you’ll get through this. You can make a story out of this.’
Hi Astrid! *waves wildly* I LOVE this: “Then I just cackle and keep going.” Amen to that. I do that, too, with the bad situations; often, even in the midst of it, I look to see what I can salvage from it for a story later.
Love it! To say turnabout is fair play would be an understatement. It’s fun to get just enough right to make them wonder.
Hi Rich! Yes, sometimes, well often, it is fun, too.
Its true, its so, so true! My very first ‘completed story’ had several girls and a teacher who needed to be ‘put in their place.’ I ended up killing most of them. o.O
Hi Ileandra! *waves* Yes, sometimes killing someone ~ on the page, of course!!
~ can be very cathartic. LOL!
HA! This is awesome, Shelli! And I dare say I may (or may not) have done this… ahem…
OH!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hi Brandon! Thanks for the fab compliment. Yes, I know, I may or may not have done it, too. < ==this is to keep my halo from slipping any more than it already has!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Awesome post! And now I shall be off, it’s time for my MC’s mother to die. Poor thing. =)
Hi Dorothy! *waves* Thanks for the compliment & the laugh. Am I allowed to say have fun killing her off?
Oh, yes! It is absolutely a wise idea to be scared of writers. There is a lot to be said for anger management through the killing of characters, and harming them, torturing them…
Hi Michelle! *waves* I completely agree that writing does wonders for anger management ~ lol.
I was going to say I don’t know how I missed this post, but I so immersed in getting Enza ready for the blog tour that I missed most everything from February through April.
But I LOVE this. Especially ‘You may be a character with a penis the size of my pinky finger.’ (even better would be the size of your little toe!)
I hope I’ve never offended a writer to the point of earning a place in one of their books. However, I have a short list of people who will find a place in mine. One already has. And one, someday, will likely find his fictional character drowned in a septic tank. (when your kids are old enough to date, their exes will make wonderful villains and victims)
Hi Kristy! *waves* Congrats on getting your book out there!
Yes, I’m sure I’ll have lots more material once my kids start dating ~ lol.
Shelli, this is delicious! And oh so true. Mental revenge is wonderful, isn’t it?
Blessings!
Hi Christine! *waves* Yes, revenge on the page is fabulous! Cheers, darlin.
Absolutely brilliant! Thanks for sharing this post. I always threaten to write my dad into a book and kill him off whenever he’s annoying me. I haven’t
yetdone it. Of course not.Hi Natasha! *waves* Thanks for the fab compliment. It’s always nice to kill someone off (on the page ~ *ahem*) when they’re annoying you.
Hi! You’re very welcome! And, I fully agree. Of course, writing death scenes of characters dear to you is an entirely different story.
True. Yes, I’ve actually cried after killing off some characters I adored.
Same here. I generally cry while writing the scene, after writing it, and when I need to go back and edit it.
[...] worth it) to do it. I always wanted to learn to shoot a gun. Now, I’m taking lessons. Careful: I’m a writer and soon I’ll be [...]
Haha! So true! Been there, done that, and I’ll never tell. ;-}
Hi Nikki! *waves*
Your secret is safe with me. lol.