The Best Advice I Ever Got

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In his amazing book, The Big Leap (read it, you won’t be disappointed), Gay Hendricks writes that each of us is 100% of a person so each of us is 100% responsible for our own lives.

The best advice I ever got

Well, sometimes we all just need a kick in the pants. So I’m here to remind you and myself that nobody else is responsible for your happiness, your choices, or your life. Nobody. I wish that wasn’t true because blame is easier and faster and doesn’t require you to get off the couch. But it also keeps you stuck & helpless because if it (whatever it is) is someone else’s fault, well then you have to wait for that person to fix it. Once you realize that nobody else is responsible for your happiness, your choices, or your life, you are set free to move forward unencumbered.

Excuses won’t get you where you want to be

How many of you have made excuses like:

  • I’m just not lucky (or as lucky as so-and-so).
  • I’m just not as gifted as [fill in the blank].
  • I have a slow metabolism (&/or diets just don’t work for me).
  • I just can’t help myself.
  • If you knew what I’d been through.
  • But my [friend/sibling/mother/father/etc.] wants me to do this.
  • I don’t have time (or money, knowledge, experience, etc.).
  • I’m just waiting for my big break (which, IMO, equals: I’m just waiting for my life to begin).

Sigh. Yes, my hand is raised too.

Be 100% responsible

If you’re not happy with your life, the good news is that it’s really easy to fix. All you have to do is choose differently. Maybe that sounds too simple, but it’s true: all you have to do is choose differently. You can keep making excuses, you can keep assigning blame, you can keep being a victim but none of that will help you get what you want. Choose differently & move forward.

Get unstuck & free yourself

I can tell you from personal experience that taking 100% responsibility for all your life liberates you to make better choices, more suited to reaching your goals. It lets you choose to see your mistakes as learning experiences instead of failures. It frees you from spending time and energy looking for a culprit. It gets you unstuck. It helps you grow. And all of that is empowering. All of that makes you stronger. All of that helps you get you to the life you most want.

So be free. Take 100% responsibility for yourself. And watch your life bloom.

4 Responses to "The Best Advice I Ever Got"
  1. This is GREAT advice, Shelli! Thanks for the reminders. 🙂

  2. Great advice, Shelli!

    Until we learn we that we are completely responsible for our actions we will deceive ourselves. In my opinion, excuses are more about self-denial than about sharing convincing arguments with others.

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